I feel it deeply
necessary to be open to light the greatest trial and blessing
that I have had the privilege of experiencing yet in my life:
homosexuality.
Societal
conversation on this issue is sadly reflective of the divisiveness
that pervades our entire sociopolitical discourse. It is a bunch of
screaming and shouting on “love and acceptance, sin and morality,
aspirations and despair,” but in the midst of this onslaught of
arguments, the people this conversation represents are often lost,
divided up into categories, reduced into patterns of behavior and
made and condemned or condoned as the poster children of a myriad
political causes.
We forget that in speaking of homosexuality, we are speaking of that same awful, powerful force that has dominated the whole of human art, poetry, music and theater, controls the siring of each progressive generation, and shapes our relationships to ourselves and each other. For the people it affects, it is not just some trick of mortality, not just some variation of human sexuality, not just some activation of the parasympathetic nervous system but a complex reality that affects every aspect of life. In recognizing this, we will be able to humanize the experience of same-sex attraction and understand it in the depth of true light.
We forget that in speaking of homosexuality, we are speaking of that same awful, powerful force that has dominated the whole of human art, poetry, music and theater, controls the siring of each progressive generation, and shapes our relationships to ourselves and each other. For the people it affects, it is not just some trick of mortality, not just some variation of human sexuality, not just some activation of the parasympathetic nervous system but a complex reality that affects every aspect of life. In recognizing this, we will be able to humanize the experience of same-sex attraction and understand it in the depth of true light.
I want to add my
voice to the conversation, not just as a “gay” man, not just as a
Mormon, not just as an American or a Millenial or (insert simplifying
label here.) These are all words signifying important parts of me,
but I am a whole being with many facets, not just a gay man, not just
a Mormon, not just this or that. You can't discuss these personal
characteristics of mine without some understanding of how they relate
to the whole being, and not miss something deeply precious.
Understanding. Understanding. Such a precious, precious word, and so lacking in society. I hope that soon, our conversation about this will begin to humanize, helping all sides of this enormously difficult issue to respond with understanding towards one another in recognition of our worth and beauty in the eyes of God.
I call for you,
reader to understand; but every story is different and understanding
the complexity of even one such story requires difficult, continual work
on the part of the one understanding. I can certainly say that my
story and my desires, as I will lay out hereafter, will be mystifying
in the eyes of many on every side of the issue. So I ask you, reader,
for understanding; and if you cannot give understanding, then I ask
you to at least give respect for what you will read. You may not
agree with much of what I say, but I am not speaking as a poster
child, a spokesperson, a PR representative, or a political advocate.
It is my sacred story that I will be spreading open to you.
“Tread softly, for you tread on my dreams.”
“Tread softly, for you tread on my dreams.”
- William Butler Yeats
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